What do you do while stopped at a red light? How about standing in line at the grocery store–what’s your go-to mental activity? How about while waiting on the phone for a service person with outrageous music playing?
Any one of those can conjure up my mental complaint factory, and if I stew in that place long enough, it bleeds into self-righteousness, disgust, or maybe something that approaches rage (see, I can hardly say it). In all of these settings, my plan for how things should be going is being interrupted by other people doing whatever they need to be doing–but in front of me.
I may not be alone in these mental habits. They all result in unsettled mental activities in the anger family. I have my mind and thoughts set on the future, whether that is five minutes from now, or several hours later. This event in front of me is disturbing the plan. My plan. My control over the future–which is afforded to none of us.
I have been taught by compassionate and generous teachers that in any of these situations, I can stop and find one thing to bring my focus to, and breathe. It could be the redlight. It could be a tomato in my grocery cart. It could be a bird outside my window while I am on hold with the blaring music. And I breathe . . . myself . . . back . . . into . . . the . . . present . . . moment.
If my mind slips away to try to control the future again, I stop. I focus on that one thing again. And, I breathe . . . myself . . . back . . . into . . . the . . . present . . . moment.
So far, there has never been a red light, or a grocery line, or a call waiting with blaring music that could out last my breath in the present moment, but there have been plenty of occasions where my attempt to control the future has lasted for hours beyond what was really just a brief moment. It’s never worth it, that kind of frustration. Breathing, in the present moment, heals.
~Bob Patrick
