Before I started working with a trauma therapist, I had a habit of holding onto and hiding
my feelings. This is especially true of unpleasant emotions, particularly anger. But in doing so, the anger only came out in ways that proved negative for me and my behaviors.
Now I try to express my emotions by talking things out with people I have concerns with, sometimes writing them down first in my journal so that they are not so loaded. I am learning that including all of my emotions in what I express as I feel them gives me the freedom to get my needs met in a more positive way. That makes anger less scary than it previously was.
I unfortunately had to learn this as an adult because expressing anger as a child only brought punishment, criticism or simply not being heard at all. I have had to learn to include those feelings so that I can feel like myself, wholly human. In these times especially we need to acknowledge all our ‘feels’, pleasant and unpleasant, as that is to acknowledge who and where we are at the present. That gives us the power to cope better, but also to know that we can still feel joy amongst all the despair and fury.
~Jen Garrison
