Growing up, I remember the label on my pants: “husky.” That’s what society had decided I was, as if that single word could sum up my entire existence. I’ve never been skinny, and I grew up hearing comments about my body, from my stepfather. His cruel words, combined with the world’s obsession with thinness, took a deep toll on my self-esteem. Overeating became my refuge, a way to cope with the hurt and insecurity that I tried to ignore. For years, I struggled in silence, convinced that my body was the problem, the reason I didn’t fit in—both literally and metaphorically.
But now, in my 40s, I’m waking up. I’m listening—not to the voices that told me I was unworthy, but to my own body and soul. They are telling me that I’ve been mistreated, not just by those who should have loved me but by a world that judges based on size. I’ve come to realize that the treatment I endured was wrong, and I’m no longer willing to accept it. It’s not just about me, either. It’s about seeking justice for all of us who’ve been marginalized, overlooked, and discriminated against simply because of our size.
It took doctors three long years to find the correct diagnosis for my back pain. During that time, I heard the same dismissive phrase over and over again: “If you lose weight, you wouldn’t be in so much pain.” They acted as if my size was the only reason for my suffering. But I knew better. I’d always been overweight, and I had never experienced the kind of debilitating pain that left me bedridden after something as simple as walking up a hill. It wasn’t easy to challenge the doctors, to stand up and say, “I don’t think it’s because of my weight,” especially when that’s all I had been hearing for most of my life.
Now, I listen in a new way. I listen to the stories of others who have faced discrimination because of their weight. I hear the pain in their voices, the frustration, the anger. And I find strength in these stories. I know that I’m not alone, and I’ve found a cause that resonates deeply with me: seeking justice for those of us who have been dismissed, shamed, and belittled because of our size.
I channel this desire for justice by spreading awareness, by talking about the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance (NAAFA) and by making sure that people know that size doesn’t determine worth. Size doesn’t define us. We are more than our bodies, and we deserve to be seen, heard, and treated with respect. This journey isn’t easy, but it’s one I’m proud to be on—for myself and for others like me.
I now proudly say: “I am fat”
~Candice Carver
