Before I even get beyond this first line, I want to say that I do not pretend for a moment that the following issues are easy or simple. There, having said that . . .
The differences among Americans right now are real, and it can feel oppressive and scary when we hear 30 second news clips–which have taken what are often complex situations and distilled them down to . . . 30 seconds of words.
NPR conducted a survey recently that caught my attention. The survey established the top concerns of conservatives and progressives. Here’s what it showed.
Conservatives said “instilling children with faith in God, teaching them that hard work and discipline pay off, and to abide by the “Golden Rule” were most important. Their biggest concerns for the country were a lack of values and becoming weak as a nation.”
Progressives said “overwhelmingly that teaching children to treat others as you would want to be treated, the Golden Rule, is the most important value to teach children. That was followed farther back by “education being the key to success” and “be happy and follow your dreams. (They) are most concerned about a rise in extremism and fascism, topping everything else by a wide margin.”
This theme of the gift of pluralism is inviting us to look a little deeper. There are, to be clear, differences in how conservatives and progresses express their values and most important concerns, but there are some similarities. Both groups said that the Golden Rule, treating others the way we want to be treated, was important to them. And while it appeared at different places on each groups “values list” that could be a powerful starting place for finding a way to work, live, love and be together as a nation. When conservatives then talk about the weakening of the nation, progressives are concerned about that, too, particularly around extremist and fascist trends.
At first glance, we don’t see or hear the common ground in each other’s words. That’s where I’m scratching and digging this month–I hear what you are saying, and I wonder if it might be similar to something I call by another name.
~Bob Patrick
It takes experience, practice and courage to find common ground. The verbiage and behavior of people on both sides of the divide may look like conflict if we are unsure and afraid of the outcomes, or concerned for our personal well being ( fight, flight, freeze). To be able to come to common ground one has to step aside from protecting core/personal values and expectations for a long enough period that the context of the “conflict” can surface and allow for broader interpretation such as the Golden Rule. I feel that we have found ourselves in an entanglement so complex that the Golden Rule is a 21st century paradox. It is so very fundamental, So very simple and yet so very adulterated that no social system will untangle it. It is now a matter for science to run its course..