To liberate, to set something free. “If you love me, let me go,” words spoken a few times, and many songs feature it in their lyrics. One song in particular is “This is Gospel” from Panic! At the Disco. The writer of the song Brendon Urie indicates that the song has many facets of emotional inspiration and one of them was dealing with a bandmate who was struggling with addiction. Brendon states that he was mad at himself and mad at his drummer.
The song’s chorus “If you love me, let me go; These words are knives and often leave scars; The fear of falling apart; Truth be told, I never was yours; The fear of falling apart” brings us to realize that love is never ours. I think about this and see for myself that I never really freely let myself love me!
If you’ve ever heard the words “If you love me, let me go” it truly is like a knife to your heart. As time goes by and one is able to evaluate the relationship, the wound is sometimes soothed with understanding and forgiveness. Have you ever said that to yourself though? If I love ME, I’ll let ME go. If I really loved myself I’d be free to let myself go. What does that mean?
To me this means that I’m liberating my ego from protecting my soul from the pain and pressure of love, past, present and future. I’m letting my ego rest from its trauma responses and allowing my soul to explore the emotions from love’s loss and love’s hurts. I’m allowing myself to fall apart, I was never truly mine… because I had a fear of falling apart.
Allowing myself this liberation isn’t done overnight, this has taken me many moons and will take many more to truly be free of the grime that is love.
~Candice C Carver
Letting go can be liberating love and I agree, it takes eons of work – thanks for sharing!