I remember sometime last year, or the year before, saying I would be more present for my family and friends. Needless to say, I don’t feel I did so well on that effort. Life isn’t so black and white, and the goals we set for ourselves are rarely as simple as we hope. Life happens. Challenges arise, distractions creep in, bodies and brains decide to not work as well and often, the sun doesn’t emerge from the darkness as quickly or as brightly as we’d like.
This past year, I’ve realized that presence isn’t just about showing up. It’s about making space—for ourselves, for others, and for the ways they show up for us. I often reflect on my presence with everyone during the Winter Solstice. The longest night reminds me that even in darkness, there is a spark of light waiting to grow. But just as the Earth must make space for the returning sun, we too must make space for each other’s light.
During the Solstice ritual, we walk into the darkness. In my family we place items that we intend to let go of on our yule log and burn it on the night of the 21st. In the stillness, I personally, reflect on what I carry and what I need to release. We then light candles, symbolizing the returning sun, and also the light of presence within ourselves. We then carry these candles into every room where the lights have been turned off and shout; “Here comes the sun!” We shout and cheer the return of the sun and turn on all the lights as we pass each room. The act of lighting the flames and carrying it to each room is a promise to ourselves and to each other—a commitment to be the light, to share it, and to welcome it in our home and from others.
Presence is not just an offering we give; it’s a gift we receive. To truly practice presence, I must learn to not only be there for others but to also let their love, healing, and hope into my life. As we hold our candles high, we honor the balance of giving and receiving, knowing that every small light contributes to the greater whole.
The smiles returning to our face is the joy of knowing we are not alone. Together, we can light the darkness, step into the new day, and live love through the sacred practice of presence. This is how we welcome the sun and bring its light into the world.
~Candice Carver
