I will not, cannot, love you for some “reason”,
Just a momentary season,
For a minute, or an instant,
Or a solitary in-tent,
I must love you past all heartaches,
Past all tortured conversations,
Past all weary speculations,
Beyond fearful hesitations,
Or the petty persecutions of electric elocution,
I must love you
With a mindful meditation,
And a willful integration
Of our contradicting natures
I don’t need it to be easy, superficial, skimming, breezy,
I need love that keeps on asking,
Keeps on proving, keeps on moving,
Past the walls of my defenses,
Closer to the core of being,
I need love that keeps on seeing,
Keeps on being, keeps believing,
Pressing on to destinations,
Purified by conflagrations,
Sanctified by pure sensations.
I wrote this eighteen years ago after a BIG fight I had with my husband Daniel. I was mad and trying to look forward…where did I want to be?…in a month?…in a year?…in a decade?… And then I wrote this piece… It sang its way out of my head and onto a piece of paper. I can’t remember what the argument was about but I periodically would read it again and again over the years. I renamed it Valentine for Charisiel (his magickal name). And I realized it was a spell… A mantra…a visualization… A prayer to bring me back to my heart and stay on the path that I set for myself.
Thank you, Sherree. What a lovely spell.
This poem has stood the test of time , a difficult situation, and has healed the bruises of arguments. It sounds to me that this “mantra” could easily become lyrics to a song. It has a melody and a cadence that askes for a musical background. In any case, it stands alone in solo, as well as a collective feeling where we can identify with the forever , and the after. Thanks for sharing, you are quite the poet.
What a powerful stirring poem!