The elusive sense of belonging to something… When we have that sense we feel more relaxed, more confident, more capable, and more at ease with ourselves and those around us. Without that sense we can feel lost, unsure, and a deep sense of longing. It is so important to feel as though we belong to something.
Let me rephrase – It is so important that I feel like I belong to something.
When my children were young I knew that I belonged with them. They needed me. And when Bob jumped in to parent with me and them (because we parented together), I felt a sense of unease because I didn’t want to lose my spot of belonging. How strange it was for me to wish for a break and then, when I got one, feel so lost to be on my own.
I feel a strong sense of belonging with my spouse. We have individually successful careers and different interests and activities but choosing the commitment of a relationship when we both know we can stand on our own provides a sense of belonging – both to the promise and to each other.
I feel a sense of belonging at work. Even without a particular grade level to eat lunch with I work with everyone in that building and I learn from them each day. I know without a doubt I am needed. I belong.
But there is another reality to be considered. That is the interconnected web of life to which we all belong. Whether or not there is family, relationships, or children, or work groups as long as we walk this earth we all belong. How will be tend that sense of belonging? How will we contribute? How will we give and take so that the relationship stays in tact? What are we willing to commit to so that the relationship stays true?